Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Tubing down Buffoon River to Shylock City

Dog Poet Transmitting.......

May your dog collars always jingle at night.

This will probably come as no surprise to the reader. Many of you have seen the various documentaries about the corporate theft of public waters. If not, you can look them up. The films are riveting. In many cases, local government functionaries take bribes that allow large water tankers to go to public lakes, streams and what have you and just take the water at no cost to them. This is an ugly and twisted corporation, no different than Monsanto. Corporations and their pet livestock; the legislators that make the laws, are up to all kinds of malicious activities. I learn something new every day; something I wish I didn't have to find out but must find out about, so that all of us can look upon it with horror and hope that our collective awareness will have an impact on these kinds of things.

If you've been at the various alternative news sites that I visit and am linked on, you have seen the lists of all the crazed killers, who were taking anti-depressants; cases like this one. Years ago, I was looking for a solution for my own depression. First I took Eleval and that caused me to have to use reading glasses. It also dramatically affected other body functions. So I stopped taking it. Then I briefly took Prozac and was massively disturbed by the suicidal thoughts it filled my head with. I stopped that too.

Then I discovered Ketamine and that worked really well. I caught a lot of static from the uninformed about this. However, I had the personal experience and they did not. Then, a few years later, Sweden legalized it for the treatment of depression and tests are being carried out in most European countries now as a result of this. It turns out I was right. Well, I already knew that. There are some downsides to the item but I suspect they will fix those in the mix.

SSRI's have been tracked in the systems of nearly all of these killers and suicides. I don't know what more proof anyone could need. Of course, the pharmaceutical giants don't want to hear any of this because it could affect their profit margin and we wouldn't want that. A more sinister angle is that these effects are intentional and encouraged, due to a social engineering aspect, desired by corporations, governments and the people who run them. Never put anything past these clowns, they are soulless, psychopathic husks of what may have been formerly human.

The major problem for most people is understanding what goes on in these people's minds. This is because, most of us here (I think) are normal people, according to my definition of normal (grin). These people are not normal, no more than a serial killer is normal and most of them are just that.. Mr. Visible has made a years long study of serial killers (at the same time seeking not to “look overlong into the abyss”). This I have done because I am infinitely curious about the inexplicable and because I characterize them in my novels and it is a good idea to have a feel for who may appear there. We live in an age of psychopaths and serial killers. Our presidents and lawmakers qualify as such. Heads of corporations qualify as such. Many entertainers qualify as such and all kinds of ordinary seeming people qualify as such. That's just how it is in these times of social alienation and over stimulation by garbage media and epidemic, violence fueled, entertainments. If you don't know this... boy are you dumb.

Now, you can at least check who is lying to you or hiding something. I fully expect some readers to head right over to my radio shows, or songs at the blog entries and see how any of this might apply to me (shiver-grin). Good luck with that. Don't forget to check yourself out too, heh heh.

This not just the time of psychopaths and serial killers. This is also the time of Mr. Dumbass and Mr. Indifferent, who are the natural food source for psychopaths and serial killers. The two go together like, rape and pillage. They make up the witless consumers and canon fodder, that fills the coffers and drives the industries of the predators.

When you're not a monster, it can be hard to spot the monsters. For most people, monsters are supposed to look like monsters but, that is not the case at all. Monsters can look like anyone and that is what makes it possible for them to do so much nasty shit. That's how your Ted Bundys and Jeffery Dalmers can get their victims into their cars or apartments. That's how monsters like Obama and Bush can get you to vote for them. That's how vicious tools like Ben Affleck, can get you to watch their propaganda films, which I have no intention of seeing; like that piece of crap with Brad Pitt about that phony Polish adventure. Many of these people, like Quentin Tarantino are full blown Satanists, as one can see from his recent “Django Unchained” and you can definitely throw Jamie Foxx in there and I don't guess I have to mention Tom Cruise and the rest of those Scientologists.

I know it can be confusing and disconcerting to turn on your TV; something I don't do and see an endless parade of people, who seem human and are not. You tell yourself, “well, they can't all be feral hyenas that feed on offal and human flesh; can they”? Yeah, it's altogether possible. Never underestimate the degree of self interest and ambition that motivates these people. Sure, most of them smile nice, are engaging (or can be) and seem to possess the usual gamut of human emotion. Keep in mind that this is just what psychopaths do. They effectively mimic all of these things and are capable of none of these as a normal human being is. They watch and they copy and pretend.

These are crazy days. Just look at some of the insanity that is taking place. What happens is that all kinds of unpleasant sorts set out to make big money and have no concern at all for the forward end of their escapades. It's all take the money and run. It's a t shirt that says “trust me” on the front and “hasta la vista” on the back. Just because you don't act like them because you are still saddled with morals and outmoded values like personal integrity, doesn't mean they don't act like them, because they are not burdened by any of these inconvenient limitations. Anyway, they are them. It comes with the territory. Like it says at the railroad crossing, “stop, look and listen”, or be prepared to be mulched. An entire culture and generation of vipers is being recycled as I write these words. They are being recycled in the threshers of ignorance, bad diet, permanent residency in Soft Drink City on Cheese Doodles Lane. Television is turning their brains into mush. An autopsy will show that the contents of their cranium looks like a congealed Slurpee; how it is, how it is. Of course, the psychopaths just drill into their skulls and insert a straw.

If you think I am overstating the case in any way, or being creatively imaginative, through artistic (or is that autistic?) license, think again. It's actually worse than that because we only see what is on the surface and what we can intuit or speculate upon about what lies beneath. It ain't pretty in Shylock City.

There's that section of a certain people, who serve the prince of this world and who have been given the keys to that kingdom, which makes it possible for them to do what they do. They are directly engaged in this and truly believe there is no other authority. Somehow they seem to think there is some kind of even larger payoff at the end. As a matter of fact there is but they are mistaken about the content and the quality of it. On this, you can rest assured.

Yes, most people are tubing down Buffoon River. The got a Budweiser in one hand (sadder Bud no Weiser further on) and a stroke book in the other. It's a known fact that a very large portion of all internet traffic is porn and bad porn at that. It's going on at The Pentagon, law offices, corporations, schools, churches, well, practically anywhere. Pederasty Central is a division of Coca Cola and the Catholic Church and both of them have a full time operating branch of assassins but that's been proven out through Opus Dei and all through South America and other places where the death fizz water wants to push its poison.

Ah well, I've gone on long enough. There's plenty here for you to comment on and I'll just be moving on to the next thing now. Be well all and, as have recently learned, be careful out there.


End Transmission.......

Visible and The Critical List: La Vierge Sperme Danceur by Les Visible and The Critical List♫ Reggaenomics ♫
'Reggaenomics' is track no. 7 of 8 on Visible and The Critical List's 1987 album
'La Vierge Sperme Danceur'


La Vierge Sperme Danceur by Les Visible and The Critical List

27 comments:

flying cossack said...

those that pursue a macro consciousness will indeed be depressed by a world run by murderers liars and thieves, and in which nearly everyone else is complicit ... anger and depression is a healthy reaction ... act on it ... dont supress it with chemicals

most associate the path to a macro consciousness with a human figure ... jesus, muhammad, buddha, vishna ... and they may even be macro consiousnesses ... what makes you such is taking higher account ... if you increase the freedom of the things around you, then the things around you will increase your freedom

similarly, the path to devolve in consciousness is a force we personify with satan ... satan wants you to eat, shit, and piss, on anything ... like an insect ... but when you rape steal and murder, you are restricting the freedom of things around you ... like a cancer, the rest of the body is going to severely limit your freedoms in the future

flying cossack said...

the major reason society is really dum now is that it is genetically so ... the jews butchered the smarted polish in Katyn ... they butchered the smartest russians in the 10s 20s 30s ... the satellite rus countries in the 30s 40s 50s ... if you said the communists were jews, you were killed ... if you were smart enough to manage more than 2 cows on a farm, you were a greedy capitalist and worked to death in the gulags

the europeans smart enough and courageous enough to act have all been culled ... we are the sons and daughters of the stupid and the meek ... worse yet, america is full of such people ... who emigrated to america but the people that were too cowardly to stand up in their own country or too stupid to make a business in a competitive environment

Love To Push Those Buttons said...

There is something about the so called 'elite' you write about that few think about. They are soooooooo dependent on the hoi polloi. They're 'needier' than anything. They're like a flea on a dog. They are not at all self-contained, and they could be brought down by boycotts and general lack of cooperation from everyone, if only the majority weren't preprogrammed fools who can't think their way out of a paper bag.

Tradition and conformity ain't what they're cracked up to be. Amazing what a statistically easy life I've had since I was on my own, because I don't play the stupid worthless games most play; most of which entail people burying themselves in obligations that end up going way over their heads that they'll never dig themselves out of.

Stephen Herbst said...

Great to hear from our favourite Orator and you're on a roll for sure. I've already posted three of your paragraphs on FB (grin).
Wishing you all the very best in the land of India. Hope she starts treating you better. Otherwise perhaps go further east or home!
Namaste
[I'm still the only SA connected according to the links list WTF? surely there are other South Africans who read LV..!!!

Anonymous said...

Michael rivero spoke like a king last night on the radio,,well worth checking out,,,,
These corporate entities seem to immediately shun anything that resembles humanity,,,anything that contains raw humanness in its uncorrupted form,,,,,
It's like they are scared of humans,,real ones that is,,,,,,
You could even say the people of the world are the corporations test subjects,,
I have never taken anti depressants,although I have been depressed in the past,,what I found is there are good days and bad days,,,,
And anyway how can a human come to this world,truly look at what has been taking place and not be effected by it,,,,
It is natural for humans to crave harmony,,,
As from that position we all feel very very alive,,,

Respects neil

Erica said...

Hi Vis-Thanks-enjoyed that-if 'enjoyed' is the right word?
In an insane world you are a rare source of truth.I consider myself,along with most of your visitors,to be one of the 'normal' ones!
Flying cossack-you're correct-depression is a natural reaction to this fucked-up world.Tried the antidepressants- didn't like the side-effects.Started weaning myself off them slowly,then just decided to go cold turkey.
Have not regretted this choice-would rather own all my emotions,'good' or 'bad'.

Thomas said...

WOw! That's Bad-Ass cool!

2 things, for your consideration... I think the one of them I heard from you. Most peoples astral bodies (souls) are just floating around somewhere out of the body, ne pas? makes a lot of sense...

The other is a point you bring up, that brings me to talk just a little about good and evil. A pedophile might give a child a piece of candy, and a politician might show a good example outwards (hugs, selfless service etc). These could be considered "good" acts, no? The result is evil, though.

In the same way, God might take a crowbar to your mind and make you go crazy, or you might use a lot of "bad" language to describe a situation. Both could be considered "evil" acts, but the result is good.

just, by way of examples...

This is very interesting, at least to me. Where is the border between the two? Can they really be separated, in an absolute sense? I believe that Wisdom lies in the balancing-act between the two, to get at a desired result. (who desires?)

Go Light! Rock on, beautiful Les Visible! And best wishes of really good times to Everyone! :D

Anonymous said...

I had depression and was proscribed Prozac. I tried one capsule and my intuition told me not to take another. I quit my corporate job and just followed my heart. Now, outside of the occasional bad day I feel pretty much happy about my life. I am broke and living in a small,drafty farmhouse and there is a pretty good chance I will die broke and in debt. But, I don't care. I like myself a lot more than when I was trying to chase the american dream. In spite of the bullshit life is a beautiful thing and these NWO fucks are nought but a bunch of puny losers who will never be able to change that little fact. Wait by a river long enough and the body of your enemy will go floating by.

the gardener said...

Excellent observation and report flying cossack RE: the meek survivors of many cullings.

Add to the list the culling of all the good men from the endless wars of which there have been conscription/draft taking out all the competition to the worker bees making money and honey whilst the rest of their generation of men are surrendering their rights and their lives for corporate power plays.

Having been familiarized with many priesthood holding mormon men in power positions in their power center for the past seven years now-and never having dealt with so many weasels, liars and thieves in my life and that's coming from someone raised in navy towns my entire youth and construction yards my entire adulthood... it dawned on me-those of George W's generation are all like HIM. Warhawks who've never served anything more than the mission to their church. Set up like a military detail-you get your orders-you go for the time told to you after years of indoctrination and you come home a hero.

Seeing how THAT works-it caused me a little research and there was a church outey for the draft on top of the college deferments only the 'rich' kids of the Vietnam era totally utilized for theirs and their families' benefits.

What Romney did. Now I only bring this up because in October the prophet of that church declared a new age level of 18 for the young men going on their mission. Down a year from the prior 19.

Beware the draft that eats up all the young men leaving behind the weakling users to skim the cream off the crops. Hagel has been crying for the 'equalizer of war-the Draft' for almost as long as Iraq has been invaded. The only thing worse, to me, than an illegal war is to be forced to fight in it-killing fellow man, crimes against humanity against your will. Soul wise it is heavy.

So yes-the cullings of the smart, the intelligent, the self motivated, the healthy ones has been carried out so thoroughly all over this planet that I do believe that is the main reason for these hideous invasions. Kill off the competition even if they're one year old. Competition to you and/or your future pathological spawn.

Why everything is so out of balance. Those types make sure they and theirs get theirs and yours too. And they breed with others like their selves and living the good lives off of everyone else's backs and taking everything they can to further destroy those who are a threat to them in any way... put them in jail, draft them, etc there are many ways to destroy a society for profit.

the gardener

Anonymous said...

Gardener,

Look at Britain for another example of culling --vast numbers of the smart, the intelligent, the self-motivated were scythed down in WWI. One forgets these days that 18 and 19 year old Oxford and Cambridge undergrads, as well as students from the elite public schools--Eton, Harrow Rugby--were more than willing to join the fight in France. Even a 41 year-old Churchill, a political pariah by 1915 following the disasterous Gallipoli camapaign of his design as First Lord of the Admiralty, wangled a commission to serve on the front lines with his old regiment as an infantry batallion commander. He was nearly vaporized by artillery on a few occasions which, arguably, might have been a good thing. (Imagine an American politician in 2005 trying to get into the army to serve in Iraq--it's a fantasy, of course).

However the point is, look what England has become in the 90 years since. We'll won't see any time soon another such voluntary culling of the hoi aristoi as occurred among the upper class in England in WWI.

England expelled the zio-tribe in 1290 and they weren't fully emacipated until 1858. A mere 60 years later--1918-- England was a gutted shell ripe for the plucking.

And now the same has happened to the U.S.


Mandocello

preacher said...

Jesse Ventura ~ 2012 AMERICA'S SUPER DROUGHT (Drought or Water Theft!?)

Clarity said...

SSRIs are poison, and while it's said that they are not addictive, the withdrawal symptoms can be so severe that the person feels there is not other option but to get back on them again. Withdrawal has to be done through tapering, and it needs to be very gradual and over time. Big pharma makes it difficult by making only limited dosages. A compounding pharmacy can help you get smaller doses.

These are bad news and they are dangerous. If you know anyone who is taking them and wants to stop, or if you want to offer your help, please email me for information about an excellent program I came across.

clarityATlesvisible.net
*change AT to @

Much love,
~Clarity

grassapelli said...

Dear Bhudda--
Please send me "a t shirt that says “trust me” on the front and “hasta la vista” on the back."

Some people can really turn a phrase.
Now I'm practicing non-covetousness.

Visible said...

It seems I have had to write this Origami, hopefully it does not distress too many people grin)-

By Way of Attempted Explication.

the gardener said...

Saw this from one of kenny's links, from Penny's site- Supernatural: Magic and Spelling as Mind Control-

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=Zr0VWqilcGM

very good presentation by Jose Berrera-very informative and entertaining.

Many 'aha!' moments with how it works.

the gardener

Anonymous said...

Have you been following the Sandy Hook operation? If anyone knows of one thing in the official story that makes sense please share it. That idiot savant (I'm being generous with the savant) Ryan Dawson put out a video on Sandy Hook that was complete nonsense. Is he a shill, nuts, too much Fukushima radiation? Anyhow I'm not going to get into it here because most of you probably have it figured out, and those who don't, well, damn that Osama blowing up those three towers. Good thing Obongos boys bumped him off and threw his ass in the sea.


Here is a good video clip, while not all inclusive, covers a great deal of it. All verifiable news clips.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=Wx9GxXYKx_8

One thing I would like to add that I haven't seen mentioned anywhere is Adam the "shooter" who was found with two 9mm handguns, make four handguns, no make that a long rifle (per the coroner) which was in the trunk of his mothers car during the shooting, no the car belonged to a drug dealer not his mother, damn this is confusing. Imagine what it was like for the script writers.

Anyhow they said the shooting lasted five minutes with approximately 200 rounds fired (one round every 1.5 seconds). The AR15 is a great weapon but it is my contention that you couldn't put 200 rounds through it in five minutes. It will handle rapid fire but not six+ clips in rapid succession. The heat would jam it. There was a clip on You Tube of a guy firing multiple 30 round clips through a AK47. After, I believe, four 30 round clips the weapon literally caught on fire. The AK47 is a virtual machine gun and can take it (if you ware gloves) not the AR15.

Hope Lieutenant Vance of the CT. state police doesn't read Les Visible blogs. He basically threatened to throw anyone in jail who doesn't believe the bullshit errr official story line. Well, I'm not a terrorist. I just have questions, actually I believe the bullshit. Honest.

Fud

ChewyBees said...

In retrospect of flying cossack...

I agree that everything you said is true. I have a central figure that always enters my mind (and there are many more besides) whenever we have to point out the amount of incompetents, and the circumstances of their incompetence.

Every man is ultimately responsible for himself. The proof of this is Frederick Douglass. Born a slave, freed, illiterate, self taught in reading, writing and oration, the man became one of the most intelligent men in all of American history. In my estimation, he can be put on a mantle with Jefferson, Lincoln, Adams and Bush (just kidding about that last one, wanted to see if you were paying attention).

This all occurred in the 19th century, when people had more important things to do, like thinking, instead of the mundane and poor tasks of keeping up with the Kardashians, Watching "stars" dance, and eating chips while watching fat people attempt to lose weight.

I feel there are a lot of very smart people in society, they are simply never heard from. Some may write books, some may speak at small gatherings. When you consider the monumental amount of competition they are up against with the MSM, Hollywood and Sports trifecta, even in this age men like I mentioned above wouldn't stand a chance. Watch a re-run of Deadwood; half of the dialect is so highly spoken you can barely keep up, and the other half is so filth laden you can only keep up. What a trip.

But that's no reason to stand aside and be swept away by idiocy. We are all Douglass at heart, if we want to be. The level of our enslavement may be less severe, and the moment of our awareness less intense, and the degree of learning necessary to compete with the big boys less distant, but make no mistake, we are all in the same boat as that great man, and every other great man that took oppressive circumstance and turned it into historical penetration of the deceptions of men.

I love the quote from Gladiator where Maximus calls out the Emperor with, "The time for honoring yourself will soon be at an end."

My quote: "The time for glorifying ourselves will soon be at an end."

We all do it to some degree. How much, how often and how detrimental is the real measure. An escape from that glorification of self is a large part of the escape from the enslavement scheme we all fall under.

God's speed, and Love to all of you...

ChewyBees said...

A quick side post in relation to Les Visible's article...

In 1999 I had a dual tragedy within 6 weeks time. First, my firstborn was stillborn at 8 months. My wife had to carry for several days before induction. One of the saddest times I have ever known is leaving the hospital, wife sobbing with empty arms.

A little over a month later, my Alma Mater, Columbine High School, was the first major killing spree by mentally disoriented children on doctor prescribed mind altering drugs.

Needless to say I was in the throes of some degree of PTSD. Part of it was my own fault for watching the endless broadcast of every angle of the killing that deeply affected the place I grew up, as well as myself.

One day soon after while driving to work, I watched as I followed a school bus full of kids run over an entire brood of ducklings being lead by their mother. I stopped in the middle of a 65mph highway to wave cars to a stop to let the survivors cross. Most were just tossed around, but a few were mortally wounded and more than one was limping along on smashed legs and body.

I arrived at work a shambles (I should have went home, but dedication to work, it's the American way you know). I was in sobs at it all. They sent me home, and in the aftermath more than one fellow employee advised me to get to a psychiatrist and get on "meds", as many of them already were.

Now who is crazier, I thought, "the fool, or the fool who follows it?" (thanks Obi Wan)

I did seek therapy, but drugs to make me feel better?! It was a learning time for me. In the future times improved, with guidance, self introspection, and a little help. My second daughter was born the same day one year later, the same day as her brother 6 years later. The day is still remembered as the day we lost our first, but it is always a day of celebration for what we do have.

Even writing this I can feel the sadness creep in, but I look to our mantle and see her little urn, ashes within, and know that for each passing tragedy is a platform to build upon.

Visible said...

Whoa! What a tale and as I was reading it a duck started quacking out in the yard. First duck I have heard. What are the odds on that? You have my most sincere sympathies my friend.

Meanwhile, two astrologers suddenly show up out of the blue to tell me things and one of them confirms the dream I had in the previous Origami, without having read the posting, which I directed him to. It can't get much weirder than it is. Strange and wonderful, though we shall see how it pans out.

est said...

-
chewybees

i have been reading here for years and that has to be the

most poignant comment i've read yet

'the little urn'

i am so sorry for you
i will pray, for her

and, all of us

esteban
-

Gypsy said...

Hey Vis,

I've just linked this post to my son's skype chat window...

He stopped paying any attention to my daily rants long ago, and I can no longer drag him into my room to check out an internet post or an interesting article or Youtube vid.

You can lead sheep to the water trough, but most still prefer to slurp the tasty koolaid they've been raised on, however that said?

My son was never offered kool-aid by me!

He was surrounded by video game junkies, Big Gulp slurpers and K-Dinner quaffers though. And their "normal" parents.

I was his only buffer.

So what happened then? Well, he grew up and apart from his "Abby-Normal" single mom.

I don't believe I've quite lost him to "them" yet, so I continue to attempt to be his buffer. Little old me against all of "them". Not a fair fight, in my opinion, however I persevere.

I do have some in-visible help though: other abby-normal types who I try to direct him towards on a regular basis.

I couldn't fight the good fight against all odds without word warriors like you riding shotgun.

Thanks for your support Vis.

Visible said...

Da nada

Visible said...

A new Smoking Mirrors is up now-

Swimming out Beyond the Borders of Belief.

Anonymous said...

My neighbor (I respect the guy.) is an outdoorsman with a gun cabinet; nothing but legal weapons. He says he will hold off the cops if they try to take his guns. He has a wife and 2 kids and I have to wonder what would happen to them in a stand off. Armed insurrection against the PTB didn't work out to well for Jeff Davis and Robert E Lee nor anyone else who ever tried it. I have no faith in guns nor soldiers as they are part of the problem and not the solution. If you really want to hurt these fuckers then reject materialism. I doubt they are scared of your guns.

Anonymous said...

pierre said... ( one edit, might be a dupe, i wrote this 2 days ago and now found it sitting here unposted appatently, nothing to wine about)

still, still, there's something that tells me that it's not just genes, not just this earthly sphere, much, much bigger than Ben His (and other silly humorous bastardisations Visa Vis). and if I now wax and way (rape and pillage has had it's day) and wine, then surely, if pure, I shall with disciples Jesu dine. ("mocking bird song now coming on", bring out the gong). and if I had a hammer or three, then if I tell windmills to take the salt from the sea, and melt and blast the energy into the past, overnite, store the differentials of the potentials (that's Telsa perhaps for ya) for tomorrow, we shall see. and it aint so bad (for me), and the bad is like my cats claws to a tree, practise on malpractise, and we shall still see. (well Spike Milligan wrote a book a book about a twit, or a twit of a book, so I shall have my write (like Sherlock), a pound of nought, or nought for a pound of thought).
and so sense it is not, and in the hearts of the masses, there is, other than GM molasses, something in the air, not to despair, but to fight for the right to say " no, that 'aint right". and we shall see.

this is petri dishes, 'aint it? paint it?

Anonymous said...

I worked with psychotherapists on my depression for over 5 years. One after another sended me away. In the end they wanted me to take SSRI's. I was still young and did not know much about this, but my instinct clearly told me: NO.
I never touched them.
This was a couple of years ago. I was often very angry and violent.
Thank the gods that i didn't take that stuff.
Last year i participated in several ceremonies with indigeous peruan shamans. I took ayahuasca 12 times. What the western "doctors" could not do in 5 years, the shamans did in one week. I am nearly free of depression, fear, shame, anxiety and stress.

The experience itself can be hellish and difficult, but after that your brain chemistry is changed for the better.

If you suffers from really strong depression, research this medicine.
Its not for everyone, but it is more powerful and effective than ANYTHING the western medicine can come up with.

Ray B. said...

ChewyBees, January 16, 2013 5:45:00 AM :

I was checking back on earlier postings, and just saw your Comment. My condolences on your losses...

"Now who is crazier, I thought, 'the fool, or the fool who follows it?' (thanks Obi Wan)"

Your observations on 'meds' match mine. In my opinion, that type of emotion-blocker is more of a dis-connector than an eradicator. The root feelings are still there, just waiting to be felt through. Even worse, they tend to accumulate - until the pressure to release is overwhelming, and the person "goes off their meds" with predictable results.

I had one co-worker a while back who claimed to be a bonafide mercenary. He was on Prozac, anti-depressants, and who knows what else. True stories or not, you could just 'feel' the amount of trapped emotions waiting to get out. He was at the state where any eruption would precipitate a total meltdown, and he knew it. I felt very sorry for him.

I am glad you decided to 'tough it out' and stay feeling.

Best Wishes,
Ray B.

P.S. In one of my favorite TV series, "The Highlander" (once they got beyond cutting heads off as a primary focus), there was a poignant treatment of what 'immortals' do with accumulating emotions. One type learned to feel through the agonies of lost friends, loves, etc., and remained 'open-hearted' in their stand toward mortals (and other immortals). The other type simply 'accumulated' until they had what the show called a 'dark quickening', and became detached and predatory towards mortals (and other immortals). It was very hard to find your way back after a 'dark quickening'. Man, it is amazing what truths sometimes 'slide through the net' in good science fiction or fantasy shows. (My sincere thanks to those writers, directors, etc. Your pearls are appreciated.)